Mind And Body

One of the flaws in our healthcare system here in the US is that the mind and the body are treated separately. It has taken a couple decades for me to find a primary physician, and OB/GYN, and a psychiatrist who will actually talk to each other about what is best for me.

Communication between health care providers really is vital. For instance, my hormones were so out of wack thanks to polycystic ovary syndrome that I would dive into a suicidal depression every month. I took depo shots every month, but I was still having major problems. I also had pain from fibroids and cysts. My three main providers. had a conference call to determine if it would benefit me to have a hysterectomy. They decided the surgery was necessary and the three still keep in touch to make sure I have the right hormone replacements to keep my moods even.

My primary physician and my psychiatrist also keep in touch because of my chronic pain, which always affects my mental state. I have widespread osteoarthritis as well as chronic nerve pain in my neck and shoulders. If the pain is bad, my mental state deteriorates. For instance, right now we are having a typical February in the Desert Southwest. During the day, it gets up into the low 60s, which is wonderful. But then it drops down to the high 20s at night. The fluctuations make my arthritis flare up and then I tense up, which worsens the nerve pain. The pain right now is triggering my depression and my OCD, which is a bad combination. I want to pick at my skin and pull out my eyelashes. I also want to scrub everything because I can "see" germs on every surface. But the pain and depression sap all my energy so I can't do much. Not being able to satisfy my OCD worsens the depression and if I don't keep on top of the pain and depression it can trigger a psychotic episode. This happened a couple of years ago and I ended up in the hospital for two weeks until we got it under control.

Thanks to my doctors talking to each other, I now have medications and other methods to keep the pain under control. If they were working separately like most do, I would face hospitalization every winter. Also, my primary physician now has me going to a pain clinic to deal with the nerve pain. And he is staying on top of what the new doctors are doing so that the new treatments and medications don't clash with what I am already taking.

This sort of communication between health care providers really needs to be the norm, not a rarity. We need to start thinking of the mind and the body as one thing, not separate.

Domino Effect

Well, the past few weeks have been limbo in the worst sense of the word. I was still on hold regarding surgery, which was making me anxious and depressed, and the lead-up to the election was the worst kind of stressor. It is all just a blur, thank heavens. I know I was really close to suicidal several times but hopefully I am past that.

Regarding the election - well, the worst possible thing happened. I still can't spend much time on social media because of the doom and gloom, rants, predictions, talking heads telling us how we're all going to die (or so it seems), and the occasional misinterpreted quote that just fans the flames. I will sneak on to see what my closest friends have posted and to get the latest on all the cute, fuzzy animal pages I follow and that's about it. I just don't have the strength right now to think about what the future may hold.

Regarding the surgery - on Thursday my OB/GYN Dr. Welsh called and said that she had managed to talk with my other health providers and she was confident that the surgery was a good idea. And I lucked out. No one wanted to have surgery the Monday after Thanksgiving so I only have to wait about 2 weeks instead of the usual 2 months.

My whole limbo state was a domino effect. I would see something on the news about the election and it would trigger my anxiety. I would tense up and that would make my shoulders and neck hurt. The pain would make me hunch over, which would make the muscles and cartilage in my ribs hurt. Then I would try to stretch everything out by leaning back, and that would trigger the pain in my pelvic area. Or it would start with the pelvic pain and work upward. I just couldn't win.

And that is why I am hopeful about the surgery. It won't get rid of all the dominoes, but it will remove some of them and will hopefully let me break the cycle. And if I can be in less physical pain, then I can take fewer pain meds and I won't feel so groggy and dizzy. I would be able to do my yoga stretches again (I haven't been able to do yoga for 2 months. Every time I try, my lady parts let me know that they are VERY unhappy) and that brings down my anxiety. If I'm not hunching over my midsection, then my ribs don't get so painful I feel like they're trying to puncture a lung. The shoulder and neck thing is common to my Fibromyalgia, but if I can stay calm and can do my stretches, that stays under control.

Here's to hoping we can get rid of those dominoes.

Holding On

I guess I have strong fingernails, because I'm still hanging on.

On Tuesday, my mom came with me for a consult with Dr. Welsh, my OB/GYN. She agreed that I was in pain and something needed to be done. However, she explained that she is not completely convinced that the fibroids are the cause and she doesn't want to put me through major surgery - I've never had a vaginal birth so she would have to make an incision in my abdomen to do a hysterectomy - if it won't fix things. She actually called my primary physician, Dr. Woolley, and talked to him about my situation. She is willing to go ahead with the surgery if I want to, but she also wants me to talk to my Psychiatrist, Dr. Nielsen, about possible psychiatric side effects to a surgery-induced menopause, the pain and restrictions of the post-op recovery.

I am impressed and reassured that my doctors are talking to each other and trying to get to the bottom things. My only major concern is that doctors by nature tend to be single-cause oriented. I am of a strong opinion that my pain and exhaustion are caused by multiple problems. I have no doubt something uterus-oriented is causing me major pain. If not the fibroids, then possible scar tissue from past endometriosis. I also think that my costocondritis has been overlooked as a cause for the severe pain in my sides and back. For instance, I could be unconsciously hunching over because of pelvic pain and it causes my ribs to compress and become inflamed.

My next appointment with Dr. Nielsen is on November 9. I was going to try to move it up, but I decided to use the time to gather more info. I have started a pain log. I enter in when I take pain meds, amounts, etc. I also enter in any notable pain events, with location, type of pain, and pain level. Hopefully it will yield some answers.